EMOTIONALLY-FOCUSED THERAPY (EFT) FOR COUPLES
“A person is a person through another person.” Archbishop Desmond Tutu
When we give our hearts to another in a committed relationship, we are not only investing our hopes and dreams in the other but we are also bringing our deepest relational wounds from our past into the present. We can view the challenges that inevitably arise in relationships as either a problem or a possibility. Seeing our challenges as potential for growth brings with it great rewards.
With Emotionally-Focused Couple Therapy, you and your partner can begin to heal one another of the wounds you carry and to realize the potential you each have for the capacity to love deeply. The journey through couple counseling can help you move beyond arguments and feel good about yourself and your relationship again. You will discover how to communicate with your partner in order to get their attention, feel understood, and elicit compassion and caring. Emotionally-Focused Couple Therapy can help defuse tension in your relationship as you begin to relax and respond tenderly towards each other. My goal is to help you and your partner achieve an experiential shift from fighting and defensive positions to relating in ways that foster greater trust, warmth, safety, and openness, paving the way to attachment security.
The following articles help to explain Emotionally-Focused Therapy for Couples:
https://iceeft.com/what-is-eft-public/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapy-types/emotionally-focused-therapy
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/emotionally-focused-couples-therapy
As a neurodiversity-informed therapist, I specialize in working with neurodivergent (ADHD, autism, sensory processing differences, highly-sensitive, introversion) or mixed-neurotype couples. I am self-diagnosed autistic and have been married (for 18 years!) to my allistic (non-autistic) spouse. Mixed-neurotype couples, due to differences in brain wiring, communicate and receive information in ways that may lead to increased misunderstanding, misattunement, and tendency to make assumptions.
Couple therapy sessions are weekly 55 minute or 90 minute sessions mostly in-person, with some availability for telehealth. Couple therapy is contraindicated for couples where there is active untreated addiction, ongoing infidelity, or intimate partner (domestic) violence. Both partners need to enter with the same goal, wanting to work on the relationship.
Sample EFT Couple Therapy Schedule
The beginning of our work follows a 2:1:1:2 format:
Session 1: Couple Session to assess fit (55 min)
Sessions 2 + 3: Individual Sessions with each partner separately (90 min each)
Sessions 4 +: Couple Sessions (55 min or 90 min)
NEURODIVERSITY SUPPORT GROUP
Do you identify with being introverted, highly-sensitive or an empath? Have you ever been diagnosed with autism, ADHD, sensory processing disorder, OCD, anxiety, depression or other neurodivergent ways of being? Are you prone to feeling sensory, cognitive, and/or emotional overwhelm? Do you have an underlying sense that there is something different about your mind, emotions and/or experiences?
Neurodiversity refers to the healthy variation in how different people’s brains receive, process and respond to stimuli. To function well, those of us who are diagnosed or who identify as neurodivergent need to understand our neurology and how best to support and advocate for ourselves so we can flourish in a world that is not set up for us.
In this online 6-week group, we will learn:
1) How our brain / neurology / nervous system works
2) How our unique neurology affects our emotions, thoughts, behaviors, and relationships
3) The importance of self-understanding and a self-care routine that stabilizes our nervous system
4) Ways to work with anxiety, depression, meltdowns and shutdowns
5) Tools to best support and integrate neurodivergent identity
Weekly Schedule:
Week 1: Introduction to neurodiversity / neurodivergence, cognitive overload
Week 2: Sensory dysregulation
Week 3: Emotional overwhelm
Week 4: Nervous system dysregulation / meltdown / shutdown
Week 5: Burnout
Week 6: Neurodivergent strengths, building resilience, self-advocacy
Show up as you are able. Focus and presence look different for everyone, so please embrace what works for you. Move about, engage your hands, eat. It is fine to have your video camera turned off.
If interested, please email me to be put on a waitlist for the next class: jennyleungtherapy@gmail.com